When I think back to this day I remember waking up not feeling at all rested and it was snowing. On this day 4 years later, I woke to the same restless night and snowing. I couldn’t believe that you were going to be born on this day and still cannot believe it. But here you are and well our lives have never been the same.
You are a constant bundle of laughter. Your personality shines through with everything that you do. You are terribly bright and can say things with a straight face. I knew you were going to be a tough guy when you fought your way through the ICU. You think you are very tough that you pick fights with your brother and wrestle with him even though he is 15 months older and at least 1 inch taller.
You have many toys that you love. Right now you are very much into any characters from the movie, Cars. I think Mater is your favorite but you do sometimes prefer Lightening McQueen. You’re all time favorite car is the Mustang. You can spot a real one miles away and even the older models. We took you to a car show and you loved every minute. Your grandparents bought you a toy mustang to play with you took it to bed with you every evening until…well you got some new toys for your birthday and the mustang was set aside. But you do play with it as well.
Your 4th birthday photo shoot couldn’t have gone any better. You smiled when she told you to smile and you were of course yourself. The snickering shots of you are how you are on a daily basis…quite devilish. Your shirt was especially created for you because you love monster trucks. Your favorite video is Monster Truck Mater and one of the characters is the green cement truck you are playing with in the photos. I bought that for you moments before your shoot so that you would be happy and that you would have something to play with during the shoot.
You can be the sweetest and kindness little boy when you want to or sometimes when you aren’t trying. You love for us to snuggle with you at night. You must sleep with your froggy blanket and any toy of choice for the night.
I saw an instant change in you right before you turned 4. Your words and speech were more thought out. We can understand you a lot better. You don’t whine as much as you used to but honestly hope you will grow out of that phase. You generally whine/cry when you don’t get your way or you can’t express yourself. When you are hungry or very tired you lose all control and we sometimes have to hold you until you calm down. But most of the time we give you to the count of three to calm down.
You love to sit in my lap when we are reading a story. Something that you and I have always enjoyed. You are also very interested in what I’m cooking and especially baking. You love to be right next to me hoping to lick the beater or bowl. You definitely have a sweet tooth. You prefer yogurt and orange juice compared to Braedon who likes milk.
You really enjoy nature and the outdoors. We have some cardinals who visit us and I told you that they were your cardinal. When they chirp, I say that it’s your cardinal calling you. It says good morning or where have you been. When we are out in the neighborhood you can hear it calling you and you turn to me and say, “That’s my cardinal.”
There are times when you can be quite naughty or mischievous. I am unable to plant anything because you have torn them up over and over again. You have dumped over the cat litter box and rolled your trucks through it saying look at me I’m driving over the mountains. You like to go in the refrigerator yourself and get out the gallon of OJ or milk and bringing it across the living room to ask for some. You’ve written on the wall saying they were mountains. You like to make messes with food dumping things or making lots of crumbs. You like to go outside and pee—not just on the tree but wherever you see fit (and no matter how hot or cold it is). When we ask you why you do the things you do…..your answer—Because I did.
You are a leader at times and a follower at other times. But when there is something you just don’t want to do…..you just won’t do it. There are times when you and your brother get along amazingly and times when you have knock out drag out fights. You are becoming more independent as the days progress. Deep down I believe that you are the best of buds.
You love your baby sister but sometimes she gets in your way or you think she’ll get in your way and you do something to her. You either push her or take things away. But you are also very protective of her as well. You look out for her well-being and you include her in some of the things you play.
Overall you are a very unique child and we are so happy to have you in our life. We were terribly sad when you were born that we weren’t sure if you were going to make it. After 24 hours, I knew that you would and that we would have a fighter on our hands.
Happy 4th birthday—I hope it was everything you wanted it to be and more.
Love—your mommy
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Thank you for being a crappy mom…
My epiphany only comes since having children myself. I realize that I have my mother to thank for this. Really? Yes my mom will never win the mother of the year award. What mother is perfect? She did her best—right? She was a single mother and working full time. She didn’t have time to make a homemade meal (but I seriously think she could have tried harder). I remember many of her notorious meals—spaghetti with tomato juice from a can, ghoulosh (couldn’t remember what was in it but it was a glop of grey goo), and some sort of chop suey a la “La Choy”. Some of these meals were created when she was still married and supposed to be a full time mom.
As for me I certainly didn’t think of these things before having children. Like the realization that you are responsible for this person until they are capable of doing everything for themselves.
While I’m making dinner this evening these thoughts crept into my mind. I’m responsible for feeding my children! If I don’t plan accordingly the natives get restless and war will be declared. Crying, whining and inconsolable nagging will reign supreme. On my best days, I have made a meal plan for the week and shopped accordingly. Today is one of those good mommy days where I have planned ahead. I generally try and start dinner around 4pm as my children desire to eat around 5pm. I made mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and steak (I know not really exciting but it’s all homemade).
Why is everything homemade? Why don’t I take the easy route and open a box, can, or something frozen?
I have my crappy mother to thank. And for that, I say thank you to my mother for opening a box of flakes and “making” potatoes as if we were in the army getting our “rations”. I can also remember cupcakes from a box, frosting from a can, pudding a la Jello, and hungry man frozen dinners.
Ironically, she has propelled me into being a better mom in the food department. I know I have a long way to go and I’m certainly not going to be awarded mom of the year anytime soon, but I’ll keep striving to get there.
I’m sure one day my kids will try to recall their memories as a child and they’ll probably say—you were a crappy mom. My reply….not as crappy as mine.
As for me I certainly didn’t think of these things before having children. Like the realization that you are responsible for this person until they are capable of doing everything for themselves.
While I’m making dinner this evening these thoughts crept into my mind. I’m responsible for feeding my children! If I don’t plan accordingly the natives get restless and war will be declared. Crying, whining and inconsolable nagging will reign supreme. On my best days, I have made a meal plan for the week and shopped accordingly. Today is one of those good mommy days where I have planned ahead. I generally try and start dinner around 4pm as my children desire to eat around 5pm. I made mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and steak (I know not really exciting but it’s all homemade).
Why is everything homemade? Why don’t I take the easy route and open a box, can, or something frozen?
I have my crappy mother to thank. And for that, I say thank you to my mother for opening a box of flakes and “making” potatoes as if we were in the army getting our “rations”. I can also remember cupcakes from a box, frosting from a can, pudding a la Jello, and hungry man frozen dinners.
Ironically, she has propelled me into being a better mom in the food department. I know I have a long way to go and I’m certainly not going to be awarded mom of the year anytime soon, but I’ll keep striving to get there.
I’m sure one day my kids will try to recall their memories as a child and they’ll probably say—you were a crappy mom. My reply….not as crappy as mine.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Bradeon turns 5
Dear Bradeon,
I can’t believe that you are 5 years old today. I can remember when you first came into our lives and how much you’ve grown. You are a very thoughtful, insightful, caring and loving son/brother. You are a big helper whenever you are asked to do something and you are very reliable. You are very well mannered and sensitive at times.
Your favorite toys are legos at the moment but you like matchbox/hot wheels cars, your optimus prime you got last year for your birthday, and various other materials. You are very imaginative with your toys and generally use all of them during a weeks time. This year you graduated from dupulo legos to the real deal. Although we are constantly finding the little parts all over and in Jillian’s mouth. You also got magna tiles and some science experimental stuff. We took you to legoland and you picked out the racers set. It was a wonderful day.
I made some cupcakes for your birthday that we shared with some homeschool friends and then we came home to play. Your dad came home from work and we sang happy birthday. You wanted to blow out the candle again, so we sang to you twice.
Your favorite food is milk. You always want a “baba” instead of eating something but you do love candy. Not a lot of candy--you do like good things in moderation. Your favorite color is blue.
On Sunday, we will be celebrating your birthday with your friends and relatives. All of your cousins will be there and your grandparents. We’ve hired someone to bring in some animals for you to view and learn.
It was a fun year watching you grow and see how much knowledge you have gained from the prior year. We are homeschooling you and you are doing amazingly. You love for us to read books but you are trying to read on your own. You know all of your letters and most of the sounds. You love to count and can count to 100 (maybe even further if I ask). You don’t quite like to write yet. Drawing and writing are not your thing. You do like to trace your fingers on the letters with me while I make sounds as to how they should be drawn. You can spell your name and know your address. You are very smart young boy and are almost as tall as me at 5. I keep telling you by 10, you’ll be taller than me and can help me reach things in the top cabinets.
I love your spirit, you seem to have an old one. I see a lot of myself in you and am really proud. We want you to be successful at whatever you decide to do in life. We are here to give you the tools and wisdom to do so.
We love you so much and can’t wait to see how the next 5 years turn out.
I can’t believe that you are 5 years old today. I can remember when you first came into our lives and how much you’ve grown. You are a very thoughtful, insightful, caring and loving son/brother. You are a big helper whenever you are asked to do something and you are very reliable. You are very well mannered and sensitive at times.
Your favorite toys are legos at the moment but you like matchbox/hot wheels cars, your optimus prime you got last year for your birthday, and various other materials. You are very imaginative with your toys and generally use all of them during a weeks time. This year you graduated from dupulo legos to the real deal. Although we are constantly finding the little parts all over and in Jillian’s mouth. You also got magna tiles and some science experimental stuff. We took you to legoland and you picked out the racers set. It was a wonderful day.
I made some cupcakes for your birthday that we shared with some homeschool friends and then we came home to play. Your dad came home from work and we sang happy birthday. You wanted to blow out the candle again, so we sang to you twice.
Your favorite food is milk. You always want a “baba” instead of eating something but you do love candy. Not a lot of candy--you do like good things in moderation. Your favorite color is blue.
On Sunday, we will be celebrating your birthday with your friends and relatives. All of your cousins will be there and your grandparents. We’ve hired someone to bring in some animals for you to view and learn.
It was a fun year watching you grow and see how much knowledge you have gained from the prior year. We are homeschooling you and you are doing amazingly. You love for us to read books but you are trying to read on your own. You know all of your letters and most of the sounds. You love to count and can count to 100 (maybe even further if I ask). You don’t quite like to write yet. Drawing and writing are not your thing. You do like to trace your fingers on the letters with me while I make sounds as to how they should be drawn. You can spell your name and know your address. You are very smart young boy and are almost as tall as me at 5. I keep telling you by 10, you’ll be taller than me and can help me reach things in the top cabinets.
I love your spirit, you seem to have an old one. I see a lot of myself in you and am really proud. We want you to be successful at whatever you decide to do in life. We are here to give you the tools and wisdom to do so.
We love you so much and can’t wait to see how the next 5 years turn out.
Friday, September 17, 2010
How did my mother do it?
Today I was trying to do many tasks and while I was in the kitchen, Jillian pulled up one of her push toys and proceeded to climb on top. She was trying to get something off of the counters. One of the boys pushed the toy in the kitchen and she decided to use it to her advantage. I said wow, how did my mother do it?
The boys were not much climbers. In fact, Braedon has to be coaxed into climbing things that are intended for him to climb! Sebastian is more adventurous but not like Jillian. She’ll try to get up on everything and I’m constantly keeping an eagle eye on her to keep her out of harm’s way.
Unfortunately, my mother is unable to tell me if my siblings or I were this ambitious or how she handled this situation. I know there were times my mother was the single parent as my father was out fighting the Vietnam War during 2 tours of duty. She had to manage 3 kids by herself.
This then leads me to a discussion I was having with my husband about raising our kids. I sometimes question the ideas we have about raising them and if we are doing right by them. Should we being doing this or that? What if we didn’t do this or that? I never let my children see me doubting my parental abilities but I do often wonder.
I afraid there will come that day when we get into an argument and they question me about my parental style. So I have decided to write this now as they are young (5, 3, 1.5) to let them know the sacrifices we have made to have them in our lives.
Here are the many things we wanted to give you:
I decided to stay home and not work to be able to teach you everything I know and more. Your father worked long hours but played with you every second he could. I breastfed each one of you and lost many many hours of sleep so that you can be nurtured throughout the night. When you needed to be cuddled, snuggled or just needed someone with you for comfort, we always said yes. All of the many games we made up and played like goodluck on the bed, tag, hide and seek, baseball, or you can’t make (get) me. For all the baba’s you needed throughout the day and night. I took you to museums, zoos, Legoland, arboretum, park, and other special places so you could experience everything. Sometimes we would just take our bikes and ride around the town.
I admit to you now that I’m not the best parent but I can state that I’m doing the best that I can to give you the best life has to offer. So when it’s your turn to ask how did you do it? I’ll simply say: I just did it. I know I can always use this motto to help me get through the toughest days and hope that tomorrow will be better.
To see you smile, laugh, play and learn is all that we ever envisioned when we decided to have you.
We love you and always will……
The boys were not much climbers. In fact, Braedon has to be coaxed into climbing things that are intended for him to climb! Sebastian is more adventurous but not like Jillian. She’ll try to get up on everything and I’m constantly keeping an eagle eye on her to keep her out of harm’s way.
Unfortunately, my mother is unable to tell me if my siblings or I were this ambitious or how she handled this situation. I know there were times my mother was the single parent as my father was out fighting the Vietnam War during 2 tours of duty. She had to manage 3 kids by herself.
This then leads me to a discussion I was having with my husband about raising our kids. I sometimes question the ideas we have about raising them and if we are doing right by them. Should we being doing this or that? What if we didn’t do this or that? I never let my children see me doubting my parental abilities but I do often wonder.
I afraid there will come that day when we get into an argument and they question me about my parental style. So I have decided to write this now as they are young (5, 3, 1.5) to let them know the sacrifices we have made to have them in our lives.
Here are the many things we wanted to give you:
I decided to stay home and not work to be able to teach you everything I know and more. Your father worked long hours but played with you every second he could. I breastfed each one of you and lost many many hours of sleep so that you can be nurtured throughout the night. When you needed to be cuddled, snuggled or just needed someone with you for comfort, we always said yes. All of the many games we made up and played like goodluck on the bed, tag, hide and seek, baseball, or you can’t make (get) me. For all the baba’s you needed throughout the day and night. I took you to museums, zoos, Legoland, arboretum, park, and other special places so you could experience everything. Sometimes we would just take our bikes and ride around the town.
I admit to you now that I’m not the best parent but I can state that I’m doing the best that I can to give you the best life has to offer. So when it’s your turn to ask how did you do it? I’ll simply say: I just did it. I know I can always use this motto to help me get through the toughest days and hope that tomorrow will be better.
To see you smile, laugh, play and learn is all that we ever envisioned when we decided to have you.
We love you and always will……
Monday, September 13, 2010
Beloved Bjorn
I’m not sure how or where I first heard of the Bjorn but when I became pregnant with my 1st child it seemed like the latest in baby boutique to wear your child. So I did a lot of research and bought the “active” baby blue Bjorn on Ebay. The package arrived on a Monday and unknown to me, my 1st would be born that next morning. Perhaps this was a sign of fate? I remember riding the bus home and reading the Bjorn box stating you could wear your baby and breastfeed (later I realized that isn’t a possibility).
Well I never realized how much the Bjorn would be an integral part of mine and my baby’s life. I remember that as soon as I could wear him, he went in and loved every minute. I could cuddle and snuggle him wherever we went. When he was fussy, I could put him in there and instantly soothe him. Once I felt comfortable that he could face forward, a whole new world opened up for him. This lasted for almost a full year because he then began to walk and no longer needed to be carried.
When my second baby arrived, he instantly went into the bjorn. Although it wasn’t equipped with an infant insert, I bundled him up with a blanket and gently placed him inside the pouch. It was a great way to bond with him while we were out and about with his older brother. Again, I wore him all of the time. We never took the car seat out of the car. I always transported him via the Bjorn. As my 2nd began to get heavier, the Bjorn seemed to have started to wear on me.
As my 3rd child came along it was a no brainer for me to use the Bjorn. But either my body was failing me or the Bjorn was failing, I wasn’t able to wear her as long of a time as I had the others. Now keep in mind that I was also carrying around 2 other children and my stamina was low especially with a newborn. I dismissed the aches and pains and swore by my fabulous find.
The Ergo: I had been introduced to this carrier 1 year prior and I wasn’t convinced of its all mighty power. As my back continued to ache and friends encouraged me to get an Ergo. I resisted until I found one on sale for a price no one could pass. When it arrived I was in awe and saw the 3 different positions you could secure your child. Once I felt my daughter was old enough she went on the back and wow…..what a relief. I even breastfed her while walking her around in it. Amazing.
Poor Bjorn was resting in the basement for about 6 months when someone inquired if I had one for sale. I thought to myself why are you saving this? If you know of a product my superior, why would you hold on to it. So I had decided to sell my beloved baby blue Bjorn. I proceeded to tell this strange my life story with the Bjorn and how sad I was to let it go. But that her child would really enjoy it and so would she.
I had a tear in my eye as I let it go. Many fond memories were flying past and luckily have a few snapshots as evidence that I held them in the Bjorn. The new owner emailed the day after and informed me of how much her baby loved being in it. I almost felt like a pet owner whose cat had a litter and giving one of the kits to a new owner.
Bjorn: I’m glad you went to a new home where you will be loved once again and taken out on a daily basis. You had a wonderful life with the Joneses and will be fondly remembered. Thank you for being a nurturing part of my children’s lives.
Well I never realized how much the Bjorn would be an integral part of mine and my baby’s life. I remember that as soon as I could wear him, he went in and loved every minute. I could cuddle and snuggle him wherever we went. When he was fussy, I could put him in there and instantly soothe him. Once I felt comfortable that he could face forward, a whole new world opened up for him. This lasted for almost a full year because he then began to walk and no longer needed to be carried.
When my second baby arrived, he instantly went into the bjorn. Although it wasn’t equipped with an infant insert, I bundled him up with a blanket and gently placed him inside the pouch. It was a great way to bond with him while we were out and about with his older brother. Again, I wore him all of the time. We never took the car seat out of the car. I always transported him via the Bjorn. As my 2nd began to get heavier, the Bjorn seemed to have started to wear on me.
As my 3rd child came along it was a no brainer for me to use the Bjorn. But either my body was failing me or the Bjorn was failing, I wasn’t able to wear her as long of a time as I had the others. Now keep in mind that I was also carrying around 2 other children and my stamina was low especially with a newborn. I dismissed the aches and pains and swore by my fabulous find.
The Ergo: I had been introduced to this carrier 1 year prior and I wasn’t convinced of its all mighty power. As my back continued to ache and friends encouraged me to get an Ergo. I resisted until I found one on sale for a price no one could pass. When it arrived I was in awe and saw the 3 different positions you could secure your child. Once I felt my daughter was old enough she went on the back and wow…..what a relief. I even breastfed her while walking her around in it. Amazing.
Poor Bjorn was resting in the basement for about 6 months when someone inquired if I had one for sale. I thought to myself why are you saving this? If you know of a product my superior, why would you hold on to it. So I had decided to sell my beloved baby blue Bjorn. I proceeded to tell this strange my life story with the Bjorn and how sad I was to let it go. But that her child would really enjoy it and so would she.
I had a tear in my eye as I let it go. Many fond memories were flying past and luckily have a few snapshots as evidence that I held them in the Bjorn. The new owner emailed the day after and informed me of how much her baby loved being in it. I almost felt like a pet owner whose cat had a litter and giving one of the kits to a new owner.
Bjorn: I’m glad you went to a new home where you will be loved once again and taken out on a daily basis. You had a wonderful life with the Joneses and will be fondly remembered. Thank you for being a nurturing part of my children’s lives.
Monday, June 7, 2010
The run away child
When thinking about having a child, I think of holding that precious little one, rocking them to sleep, teaching them to walk and talk.
I think of all the happy moments parents are supposed to have when you have children. I would never have thought about how to I control my child so they don’t run away? I often think of how crazy I am to hire a sitter to come with us on outings because I’m afraid of losing my children. Really, spending hard cash to make sure me and my kids have a good time and all come home together.
Now of course I’m referring to Sebastian. He definitely has a mind of his own and is in his own world. I call him a very curious boy but deep down I say mischievous. He knows not to run off, yet like a bird that has learned to take flight with the wind beneath their wings, off he goes.
I will never forget the time we lost him in the Nature Museum. It’s not a large museum either but yet the kids can walk off. We were playing in the playground area and I had asked a friend to watch him while I used the restroom. When I returned we searched for him and he was nowhere to be found. Panic didn’t set in right away until 2 minutes into the search. He wasn’t answering my calls for him and again it isn’t a large place so no telling where he could have run off. Luckily, he was down towards the water area just playing in the water by himself. He thought nothing of it. This scared me to tears but
I didn’t let him see my cry. I thought if he had then he might get scared himself.
After this time frame, I thought about buying one of those tethers or “child” leashes. Really? See they made this product just for my child. The problem is that he is 3 now and I don’t think I could contain him in one of those. He’d certainly learn to remove it quickly or protest its existence so loudly that people would be begging me to take it off of him.
Today was another one of his run off on mommy and friend. We’ve been to the arboretum many times and the kids know that place like its home. We have a certain path we take each time and didn’t do things we normally do because we had friend’s with us. Astonishingly, Braedon was the first to run off but did it with his friend Evan. The two of them ran off to the frog pond while we were headed to the playground. It took us 2 minutes to realize they weren’t with us or anywhere around us. Luckily, Braedon came down and told us where he’d been. This was my first panic attack of the day.
We are getting ready to leave the playground area and hit another spot. We were gathering up the kids when we noticed Sebastian was missing. Now normally I’m johnny on the spot with them but I was a little relaxed because we had friend’s watching. Also, Jillian now wants to be mobile so I really needed to keep an eye on her so she wouldn’t be in harm’s way. So, I guess you could say I was a little distracted. I gather up Braedon and made a swoop around the place looking for Sebastian. Now I wasn’t as panicked with Braedon like I was at the Nature Museum. Braedon rarely runs off on me and generally can’t be without me for a few moments. Sebastian is fearless and would make a bee line for anything without hesitation. So certainly I couldn’t imagine him going to the frog pond but I headed that way while my friend went to look around the area we were just in. She phoned me to state he was in the little garden watering plants.
Oh, I couldn’t believe it. But really I could. No joking, one minute they are there and the next they are running off.
I wouldn’t feel such panic if Sebastian would answer me when I called for him. I want him to be free to do the things he wants to and encourage him to do so but he needs to let me know where he’s headed.
I just don’t know how to keep him close by without tying him down. I can tell him how much it scares me or that someone could take him but he doesn’t care. He was free as a bird and said to me, “I’m just watering the plants.”
I think of all the happy moments parents are supposed to have when you have children. I would never have thought about how to I control my child so they don’t run away? I often think of how crazy I am to hire a sitter to come with us on outings because I’m afraid of losing my children. Really, spending hard cash to make sure me and my kids have a good time and all come home together.
Now of course I’m referring to Sebastian. He definitely has a mind of his own and is in his own world. I call him a very curious boy but deep down I say mischievous. He knows not to run off, yet like a bird that has learned to take flight with the wind beneath their wings, off he goes.
I will never forget the time we lost him in the Nature Museum. It’s not a large museum either but yet the kids can walk off. We were playing in the playground area and I had asked a friend to watch him while I used the restroom. When I returned we searched for him and he was nowhere to be found. Panic didn’t set in right away until 2 minutes into the search. He wasn’t answering my calls for him and again it isn’t a large place so no telling where he could have run off. Luckily, he was down towards the water area just playing in the water by himself. He thought nothing of it. This scared me to tears but
I didn’t let him see my cry. I thought if he had then he might get scared himself.
After this time frame, I thought about buying one of those tethers or “child” leashes. Really? See they made this product just for my child. The problem is that he is 3 now and I don’t think I could contain him in one of those. He’d certainly learn to remove it quickly or protest its existence so loudly that people would be begging me to take it off of him.
Today was another one of his run off on mommy and friend. We’ve been to the arboretum many times and the kids know that place like its home. We have a certain path we take each time and didn’t do things we normally do because we had friend’s with us. Astonishingly, Braedon was the first to run off but did it with his friend Evan. The two of them ran off to the frog pond while we were headed to the playground. It took us 2 minutes to realize they weren’t with us or anywhere around us. Luckily, Braedon came down and told us where he’d been. This was my first panic attack of the day.
We are getting ready to leave the playground area and hit another spot. We were gathering up the kids when we noticed Sebastian was missing. Now normally I’m johnny on the spot with them but I was a little relaxed because we had friend’s watching. Also, Jillian now wants to be mobile so I really needed to keep an eye on her so she wouldn’t be in harm’s way. So, I guess you could say I was a little distracted. I gather up Braedon and made a swoop around the place looking for Sebastian. Now I wasn’t as panicked with Braedon like I was at the Nature Museum. Braedon rarely runs off on me and generally can’t be without me for a few moments. Sebastian is fearless and would make a bee line for anything without hesitation. So certainly I couldn’t imagine him going to the frog pond but I headed that way while my friend went to look around the area we were just in. She phoned me to state he was in the little garden watering plants.
Oh, I couldn’t believe it. But really I could. No joking, one minute they are there and the next they are running off.
I wouldn’t feel such panic if Sebastian would answer me when I called for him. I want him to be free to do the things he wants to and encourage him to do so but he needs to let me know where he’s headed.
I just don’t know how to keep him close by without tying him down. I can tell him how much it scares me or that someone could take him but he doesn’t care. He was free as a bird and said to me, “I’m just watering the plants.”
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Cloth Diapers
Anytime I am out and changing Jillian’s diaper, I always get the question, “what type of diapers are those?”
Then the follow up questions/comments:
Do you like them?
Are they easy to take care of?
Oh, I could never do cloth diapers
Believe it or not, I thought the same thing. In fact both of the boys grew up in disposables. So why did I switch to cloth when Jillian arrived?
I had started to order the boys diapers online about once a month and they arrived in a huge box. Then I would take the box of diapers out and then take the diapers out of that box. So, I had one huge box and then 2 box of diapers to throw away. Then every day I would fill up a garbage bag full of dirty diapers. Although our building does have a recycling program, I still felt guilty that trees had been destroyed for shipping/packing my diapers. Secondly, I was contributing to the landfill with all of those diapers. I just couldn’t bear to do it for another child.
So how did I come to choose the diapers I have?
I did a lot of research and asked around town.
First I tried the G diapers on her but she had such chubby legs that they just fit on the side and made marks on her leg. I also didn’t like the Velcro on her belly as well. That made marks because she had a very chubby belly. Also the G diapers come with a liner that is flushable/biodegradable but again, it is made up of paper and I was right back to my guilt feelings about killing trees.
Secondly, I tried the mothereas diapers. You placed an insert on the cloth diaper and then put on the waterproof cover. This was my real first experience with cloth diapers which made me a believer that cloth was the route I wanted to take. But I thought there were too many steps to take to diaper a child.
Thirdly, I was introduced to Fuzzi Bunz diapers via a great friend of mine, Audra. The perfect fit diapers are a pocket diaper. This revelation was so easy and nice. You just stick the insert into the pocket diaper and snap up the sides. When the diaper is soiled you place it in the bag/bucket of your choice. You then take them to the washing machine and wash/dry.
The caveat: You had to balance the number of diapers you have versus how many the child uses. Meaning: how many times do you want to wash and what kind of receptacle do you wish to hold the stinky diapers?
I was sold….Fuzzibunz were for our family.
Better news, Fuzzi bunz designed a new diaper…..one size diaper. Prior to this you had to buy S, M, or L diapers for each stage of your child’s growth. This equates to more money and quite possibly could cost you more than disposables. Now of course if you bought these for baby number 1 and then used them for subsequent babies then you definitely will save tons more than disposables. But for me who has decided to use them on baby #3 instead of 1 or 2, it wouldn’t be worth it.
The one size diapers are incredible! The same concept of adjustable waist clothes are for kids, they’ve taken that idea and used them in their diapers. Not only are they adjustable in the waist but also in the legs. So if you had a smaller baby you can adjust them so they don’t leak.
Another great feature are the prints and different colors. This had me sold because when you have a little girl, you want to dress her up in all the cutest things.
I had no idea how many diapers she would need but I estimated based on what I borrowed from my friend. I ordered 18 diapers and an extra set of inserts. Now I didn’t think I knew that the diapers came with 2 inserts in them but I could always use them if something happened to the other inserts.
Not only did I decide to not to use disposables but I also decided not to use wipes. Yes no wipes. Instead I purchased cloth wipes and have been using them instead.
Now, I’m as surprised as the next person that I am using cloth diapers. Why would I want to add an extra step to my life every day? But when I go back and analyze my decision, I’m not doing any more steps than what I was already doing.
People often ask about the smell or care of these diapers:
The care is very simple. I take the diaper off Jillian, I put them in a bucket in the bathroom and then to the washing machine at night. It isn’t until now that she is eating solids do I have to take an extra step for poopy diapers. When I have a very soiled diaper, I rinse it out in the toilet to dislodge the poo. Then I put them in the bucket with the others to be washed.
Yes it does smell sometimes and I just put the lid on top. Some people have a bag they use as well.
I take really good care of the diapers as I want them to last as long I need them and hopefully pass them on down the family line.
I wash them in hot water with 7th generation soap. I put them on a 2nd rinse cycle. I dry the inserts in the dryer and line dry the diapers (when its warm outside, I dry them both on a clothes line). This process takes me 2 minutes from start to finish (of course the wash cycle takes longer).
There have been a few snags with this new diaper from Fuzzi Bunz. The permeable lining inside the diaper has come off a few of them. I’m guessing this is some flaw that they have and I’ve had to send a few back. I’ve gotten replacements with no hassles.
I really love these diapers and would recommend them to anyone who is interested and aren’t the “type” to do cloth diapers. They certainly are very easy to do and care for as well as they will cost you less in the long run.
Some say that this is the lazy way to do cloth diapers. I say that it’s the new wave to using cloth diapers compared to what our parents/grandparents did for us.
I wash them and hang them up to dry just like my past relatives. So, call me lazy because my baby is a Fuzzi Bunz gal. And I wouldn’t want to do it any other way.
Then the follow up questions/comments:
Do you like them?
Are they easy to take care of?
Oh, I could never do cloth diapers
Believe it or not, I thought the same thing. In fact both of the boys grew up in disposables. So why did I switch to cloth when Jillian arrived?
I had started to order the boys diapers online about once a month and they arrived in a huge box. Then I would take the box of diapers out and then take the diapers out of that box. So, I had one huge box and then 2 box of diapers to throw away. Then every day I would fill up a garbage bag full of dirty diapers. Although our building does have a recycling program, I still felt guilty that trees had been destroyed for shipping/packing my diapers. Secondly, I was contributing to the landfill with all of those diapers. I just couldn’t bear to do it for another child.
So how did I come to choose the diapers I have?
I did a lot of research and asked around town.
First I tried the G diapers on her but she had such chubby legs that they just fit on the side and made marks on her leg. I also didn’t like the Velcro on her belly as well. That made marks because she had a very chubby belly. Also the G diapers come with a liner that is flushable/biodegradable but again, it is made up of paper and I was right back to my guilt feelings about killing trees.
Secondly, I tried the mothereas diapers. You placed an insert on the cloth diaper and then put on the waterproof cover. This was my real first experience with cloth diapers which made me a believer that cloth was the route I wanted to take. But I thought there were too many steps to take to diaper a child.
Thirdly, I was introduced to Fuzzi Bunz diapers via a great friend of mine, Audra. The perfect fit diapers are a pocket diaper. This revelation was so easy and nice. You just stick the insert into the pocket diaper and snap up the sides. When the diaper is soiled you place it in the bag/bucket of your choice. You then take them to the washing machine and wash/dry.
The caveat: You had to balance the number of diapers you have versus how many the child uses. Meaning: how many times do you want to wash and what kind of receptacle do you wish to hold the stinky diapers?
I was sold….Fuzzibunz were for our family.
Better news, Fuzzi bunz designed a new diaper…..one size diaper. Prior to this you had to buy S, M, or L diapers for each stage of your child’s growth. This equates to more money and quite possibly could cost you more than disposables. Now of course if you bought these for baby number 1 and then used them for subsequent babies then you definitely will save tons more than disposables. But for me who has decided to use them on baby #3 instead of 1 or 2, it wouldn’t be worth it.
The one size diapers are incredible! The same concept of adjustable waist clothes are for kids, they’ve taken that idea and used them in their diapers. Not only are they adjustable in the waist but also in the legs. So if you had a smaller baby you can adjust them so they don’t leak.
Another great feature are the prints and different colors. This had me sold because when you have a little girl, you want to dress her up in all the cutest things.
I had no idea how many diapers she would need but I estimated based on what I borrowed from my friend. I ordered 18 diapers and an extra set of inserts. Now I didn’t think I knew that the diapers came with 2 inserts in them but I could always use them if something happened to the other inserts.
Not only did I decide to not to use disposables but I also decided not to use wipes. Yes no wipes. Instead I purchased cloth wipes and have been using them instead.
Now, I’m as surprised as the next person that I am using cloth diapers. Why would I want to add an extra step to my life every day? But when I go back and analyze my decision, I’m not doing any more steps than what I was already doing.
People often ask about the smell or care of these diapers:
The care is very simple. I take the diaper off Jillian, I put them in a bucket in the bathroom and then to the washing machine at night. It isn’t until now that she is eating solids do I have to take an extra step for poopy diapers. When I have a very soiled diaper, I rinse it out in the toilet to dislodge the poo. Then I put them in the bucket with the others to be washed.
Yes it does smell sometimes and I just put the lid on top. Some people have a bag they use as well.
I take really good care of the diapers as I want them to last as long I need them and hopefully pass them on down the family line.
I wash them in hot water with 7th generation soap. I put them on a 2nd rinse cycle. I dry the inserts in the dryer and line dry the diapers (when its warm outside, I dry them both on a clothes line). This process takes me 2 minutes from start to finish (of course the wash cycle takes longer).
There have been a few snags with this new diaper from Fuzzi Bunz. The permeable lining inside the diaper has come off a few of them. I’m guessing this is some flaw that they have and I’ve had to send a few back. I’ve gotten replacements with no hassles.
I really love these diapers and would recommend them to anyone who is interested and aren’t the “type” to do cloth diapers. They certainly are very easy to do and care for as well as they will cost you less in the long run.
Some say that this is the lazy way to do cloth diapers. I say that it’s the new wave to using cloth diapers compared to what our parents/grandparents did for us.
I wash them and hang them up to dry just like my past relatives. So, call me lazy because my baby is a Fuzzi Bunz gal. And I wouldn’t want to do it any other way.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Jillian's 1st Year
I still can’t believe that you are 1 today. I remember a year ago waking up at 2am and my water breaking. In exactly 2 hours at 4am, you were born into your daddy’s arms. It was so peaceful and wonderful (I can’t wait to tell you when you get older). Your brother’s woke up at their usual 7am and your dad was holding you on the bed. He announced that you had arrived and they couldn’t believe there was another person in our house. They instantly fell in love with you as easily as we had. You were so quiet and sweet.
I had phoned a dear friend of ours, Marcie Alexander, to come over and help take care of your brother’s. Since we were up all night having you, your dad and I were tired. We didn’t have all that energy to take care of your brother’s. So she came over while we rested for a bit. Then it was time for her to go and I got up. She was the 1st person to hold you beside your father and I. She couldn’t believe it. Here you were so tiny.
It was a cold rainy day when you were born. I remember that because Marcie took the boys outside to feed the meter in the cold/rain.
I was so thrilled awaiting your arrival. I didn’t know if you were a boy or a girl. You seemed so high up in my belly and actually felt like you were up in my rib cage. In fact after I had you, it was hard for me to breath. We wanted you to be a surprise and what a wonderful surprise you were.
Immediately you had a personality much like your brother Braedon. You were generally very easy to meet your needs. You had a schedule and we tried hard to stick to it while managing your brothers. You adapted very well.
In this first year you have gained weight,smiled, laughed, sat up, rolled over, acquired 6 teeth, are standing up, pointing, babbling, and well on your way to walking. You are in 12-18 month clothes and I imagine soon that it will be 18-24 month. Your smile and laugh are very infectious.
You play games with us and your brother’s. You play the shy game when someone talks to you. You shy your head away or sometimes you just put your head down. You also like to play catch me. You crawl down the hallway and when we call after you, you crawl faster and giggle. When your brother’s are jumping on the bed, you love to jump along with them. You love pillows. You smother your face in them, jump/crawl on top and giggle. You love rolling around and crawling around in bed.
Your love for books is infectious. You love to look at books but mostly the letters. You point to things and start talking. Sometimes you squench up your nose and laugh at things. We can’t help laughing along with you. You are a very curious gal and like to see how things work. For example, you love to move doors back and forth.
You are a lovely and sweet addition to our family. Your brother’s are enjoying helping to take care of you and playing with you. They love to help you explore new things and help you learn as you are going along. They really look out for you and make sure you aren’t in any danger.
Thank you for being such a ray of light in our lives. We aren’t sure how we every got along without you but we sure can’t wait to see what you do throughout your years.
We love you tremendously our sweet baby Jillian.
I had phoned a dear friend of ours, Marcie Alexander, to come over and help take care of your brother’s. Since we were up all night having you, your dad and I were tired. We didn’t have all that energy to take care of your brother’s. So she came over while we rested for a bit. Then it was time for her to go and I got up. She was the 1st person to hold you beside your father and I. She couldn’t believe it. Here you were so tiny.
It was a cold rainy day when you were born. I remember that because Marcie took the boys outside to feed the meter in the cold/rain.
I was so thrilled awaiting your arrival. I didn’t know if you were a boy or a girl. You seemed so high up in my belly and actually felt like you were up in my rib cage. In fact after I had you, it was hard for me to breath. We wanted you to be a surprise and what a wonderful surprise you were.
Immediately you had a personality much like your brother Braedon. You were generally very easy to meet your needs. You had a schedule and we tried hard to stick to it while managing your brothers. You adapted very well.
In this first year you have gained weight,smiled, laughed, sat up, rolled over, acquired 6 teeth, are standing up, pointing, babbling, and well on your way to walking. You are in 12-18 month clothes and I imagine soon that it will be 18-24 month. Your smile and laugh are very infectious.
You play games with us and your brother’s. You play the shy game when someone talks to you. You shy your head away or sometimes you just put your head down. You also like to play catch me. You crawl down the hallway and when we call after you, you crawl faster and giggle. When your brother’s are jumping on the bed, you love to jump along with them. You love pillows. You smother your face in them, jump/crawl on top and giggle. You love rolling around and crawling around in bed.
Your love for books is infectious. You love to look at books but mostly the letters. You point to things and start talking. Sometimes you squench up your nose and laugh at things. We can’t help laughing along with you. You are a very curious gal and like to see how things work. For example, you love to move doors back and forth.
You are a lovely and sweet addition to our family. Your brother’s are enjoying helping to take care of you and playing with you. They love to help you explore new things and help you learn as you are going along. They really look out for you and make sure you aren’t in any danger.
Thank you for being such a ray of light in our lives. We aren’t sure how we every got along without you but we sure can’t wait to see what you do throughout your years.
We love you tremendously our sweet baby Jillian.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
The reminders of the firsts and the memories of the lasts…
When Jillian was having her difficulties last week and stopped nursing, I started to ask if this was it? Was she going to wean herself? Luckily, it was just a small issue but it got me thinking about all the lasts from my children. Now as I was thinking this I happened to came across my friend Hilary’s blog where she talked about this same issue. Again, I’m going take a bit of what she had done.
I am going to the miss all of your lasts:
To Braedon:
The last time…
-we played bouncy ball, bouncy ball, bouncy ball for…Braedon but you couldn’t say your name and would same ummmmm.
-you rolled over to get something and rolled up in your blanket. You looked like a crescent roll.
-you fell asleep in your high chair when I was feeding you.
-when you rubbed your eyes and got that sleepy look on your face. We knew it was time for bed.
-holding you and rocking you while you were drinking your milk. I would sing and sing to you until you fell asleep. This lasted until you were 2.
-you sat in your baby car seat and then your toddler car seat. You are now in a booster seat.
To Sebastian:
The last time…
-you nursed. You poor thing you were 2 years and I decided it was enough. You cried and cried and cried. I held you until you would go to sleep. You still need to be held once and a while.
-last time I carried you in the bjorn. You were getting too independent.
-you tried to sit up on your own. You started sitting up at 4 months but not by yourself until you were 10 months.
-you chewed on your multicolored teething ring.
-you swung in your baby swing. You were trying to sit up way to early and I didn’t feel safe putting you in it any more.
-holding and rocking you. I know you still remember it because you ask me to rock you occasionally.
-your last time in the baby car seat and now into your toddler car seat. You’re not that tall so you might be in this one for a while.
To Jillian…
You are still accomplishing a lot of your 1st right now. Thankfully you haven’t stopped nursing. Truthfully, I’m not sure when that will end but hopefully when its right for the both of us. Right now just remain our sweet little girl for a bit longer.
Although I will miss all of their lasts and I’m delighted that we are moving on to a lot of 1sts. Each day goes by so quickly that soon you won’t be my little ones and you’ll be off having ones of your own. Hopefully you can look back on what I’ve written to get a sense of what I felt like to be your mom. It is really an honor.
Thank you.
I am going to the miss all of your lasts:
To Braedon:
The last time…
-we played bouncy ball, bouncy ball, bouncy ball for…Braedon but you couldn’t say your name and would same ummmmm.
-you rolled over to get something and rolled up in your blanket. You looked like a crescent roll.
-you fell asleep in your high chair when I was feeding you.
-when you rubbed your eyes and got that sleepy look on your face. We knew it was time for bed.
-holding you and rocking you while you were drinking your milk. I would sing and sing to you until you fell asleep. This lasted until you were 2.
-you sat in your baby car seat and then your toddler car seat. You are now in a booster seat.
To Sebastian:
The last time…
-you nursed. You poor thing you were 2 years and I decided it was enough. You cried and cried and cried. I held you until you would go to sleep. You still need to be held once and a while.
-last time I carried you in the bjorn. You were getting too independent.
-you tried to sit up on your own. You started sitting up at 4 months but not by yourself until you were 10 months.
-you chewed on your multicolored teething ring.
-you swung in your baby swing. You were trying to sit up way to early and I didn’t feel safe putting you in it any more.
-holding and rocking you. I know you still remember it because you ask me to rock you occasionally.
-your last time in the baby car seat and now into your toddler car seat. You’re not that tall so you might be in this one for a while.
To Jillian…
You are still accomplishing a lot of your 1st right now. Thankfully you haven’t stopped nursing. Truthfully, I’m not sure when that will end but hopefully when its right for the both of us. Right now just remain our sweet little girl for a bit longer.
Although I will miss all of their lasts and I’m delighted that we are moving on to a lot of 1sts. Each day goes by so quickly that soon you won’t be my little ones and you’ll be off having ones of your own. Hopefully you can look back on what I’ve written to get a sense of what I felt like to be your mom. It is really an honor.
Thank you.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Musical beds
When I found out I was pregnant, I knew in my head that I must set up a nursery. I needed to get the crib, diaper changing table, bedding, sheets, and dresser. We ended up moving 1 month prior to my due date and well I didn’t know exactly what I was going to do. A dear friend of mine got us a pack n’ play as a baby gift. We decided to use that as our bassinet in our room until we felt comfortable putting our little one in another room.
He was in our room for about a month or so when I really started searching for a crib. I found a used one on craigslist that came along with a diaper changing table. The woman who sold it to me had 2 kids and she bought it from a family who had 3 kids. In some way I felt it was a hand-me-down crib that had lasted so long and was as some would say “vintage”.
But did he sleep in it right away? No. After he became too heavy for the bassinet part of the pack n’ play, he began to co-sleep with us. He would go into the crib during naps but at night he would be right by me. It wasn’t until he was weaned did he begin to sleep in his crib on his own. Then at 3, we felt he was too big for the crib and we put a mattress on the floor for him to sleep in his first big boy bed. It went very well.
Now of course I fail to mention that baby #2 was already here and well we needed the crib for him. Just like baby #1, he too slept in the pack n’ play but also alternated with the baby swing for night time sleeping. Sebastian was a tough baby at night. He had acid reflux and needed to be upright. Being in the swing accomplished 2 goals at once. It was a life saver for the longest time. Eventually, we needed the crib for him to take naps. Once again at night he was snuggled up with me until he was weaned. I weaned him at 2 years old. But unfortunately, he didn’t get out of my bed and well then his big brother moved back in as well.
You see their Dad works late at night and it was just easier to put them in my bed and well sometimes go to sleep with them. We had a routine, bath, book, brush, and bed. They got used to the routine and well I liked them in there for a while. There were times where I needed them out because they were hogging the bed or covers. We tried to move them out to their room several times but when their Dad wasn’t home, well again it just became easier to snuggle up with them.
The night Jillian was born we were back to playing musical beds again. They wouldn’t be able to be in bed with me as she was completely co-sleeping with me. We made a fun sleep “in” their room with the futon mattress and their Dad slept in there room with them.
Ahh, Jillian and I were like Queens in our Queen size bed…..for about 8 months. Somehow, sometime, someway….the boys came back. I think it was after they received sleeping bags for their Christmas present. They wanted to camp out in “mommy’s room”. So they managed to once again come back and regain their territory but now on the floor.
I couldn’t sleep with Jillian in my bed any further as she wanted to nurse all night long. I felt now that she is getting more food via solids it was time to transition her into her own bed. Plus she was not only rolling over but pulling herself up. I feared for her safety and couldn’t sleep many nights.
So, I have regained my bed back and my husband is currently back in my bed. The boys are on the floor with their sleeping bags, sometimes. There are times when they start off in my bed and we move them to their respective spots on the floor.
I’m redoing their room. Reorganizing or decluttering as you could say. I’m also waiting for Jillian to sleep through the night more than 2 days in a row so she won’t wake them. Yes all 3 will be in one bedroom.
Truthfully, I can’t wait until Jillian is old enough to sleep with them as it will be cute to see them all snuggle up together.
We are going to get a new bed for the boys, not sure if it will be bunk beds or twin or what. I think it’s great they sleep together.
I love to snuggle together too on occasion. In fact I just put Braedon in my bed for a late night snuggle. I’m sure his Dad will remove him at some point, but in the mean time—I’m going to rekindle my memories of snuggling with him when he was an infant.
They are only going to want to snuggle up to mom for so long and then they will want to be on their own. So, snuggle away!
He was in our room for about a month or so when I really started searching for a crib. I found a used one on craigslist that came along with a diaper changing table. The woman who sold it to me had 2 kids and she bought it from a family who had 3 kids. In some way I felt it was a hand-me-down crib that had lasted so long and was as some would say “vintage”.
But did he sleep in it right away? No. After he became too heavy for the bassinet part of the pack n’ play, he began to co-sleep with us. He would go into the crib during naps but at night he would be right by me. It wasn’t until he was weaned did he begin to sleep in his crib on his own. Then at 3, we felt he was too big for the crib and we put a mattress on the floor for him to sleep in his first big boy bed. It went very well.
Now of course I fail to mention that baby #2 was already here and well we needed the crib for him. Just like baby #1, he too slept in the pack n’ play but also alternated with the baby swing for night time sleeping. Sebastian was a tough baby at night. He had acid reflux and needed to be upright. Being in the swing accomplished 2 goals at once. It was a life saver for the longest time. Eventually, we needed the crib for him to take naps. Once again at night he was snuggled up with me until he was weaned. I weaned him at 2 years old. But unfortunately, he didn’t get out of my bed and well then his big brother moved back in as well.
You see their Dad works late at night and it was just easier to put them in my bed and well sometimes go to sleep with them. We had a routine, bath, book, brush, and bed. They got used to the routine and well I liked them in there for a while. There were times where I needed them out because they were hogging the bed or covers. We tried to move them out to their room several times but when their Dad wasn’t home, well again it just became easier to snuggle up with them.
The night Jillian was born we were back to playing musical beds again. They wouldn’t be able to be in bed with me as she was completely co-sleeping with me. We made a fun sleep “in” their room with the futon mattress and their Dad slept in there room with them.
Ahh, Jillian and I were like Queens in our Queen size bed…..for about 8 months. Somehow, sometime, someway….the boys came back. I think it was after they received sleeping bags for their Christmas present. They wanted to camp out in “mommy’s room”. So they managed to once again come back and regain their territory but now on the floor.
I couldn’t sleep with Jillian in my bed any further as she wanted to nurse all night long. I felt now that she is getting more food via solids it was time to transition her into her own bed. Plus she was not only rolling over but pulling herself up. I feared for her safety and couldn’t sleep many nights.
So, I have regained my bed back and my husband is currently back in my bed. The boys are on the floor with their sleeping bags, sometimes. There are times when they start off in my bed and we move them to their respective spots on the floor.
I’m redoing their room. Reorganizing or decluttering as you could say. I’m also waiting for Jillian to sleep through the night more than 2 days in a row so she won’t wake them. Yes all 3 will be in one bedroom.
Truthfully, I can’t wait until Jillian is old enough to sleep with them as it will be cute to see them all snuggle up together.
We are going to get a new bed for the boys, not sure if it will be bunk beds or twin or what. I think it’s great they sleep together.
I love to snuggle together too on occasion. In fact I just put Braedon in my bed for a late night snuggle. I’m sure his Dad will remove him at some point, but in the mean time—I’m going to rekindle my memories of snuggling with him when he was an infant.
They are only going to want to snuggle up to mom for so long and then they will want to be on their own. So, snuggle away!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Birthday preparations
Well birthday preparations are underway for Jillian’s big day. I always seem to go overboard when it comes to their birthdays. I work so hard because I want my guests to enjoy every aspect of the party. I want it to be an experience for all ages. But I really like doing it for the kids.
This year Jillian is getting 2 parties. Yes, 2. I know she is only 1 but well since we live in the city and have city friends we need one here. I couldn’t ask my friends to drive down about 1 hour to come for a party. But we need one with all of the family because you only turn 1 once…
For our friends I decided to make it as low key as possible making chocolate cupcakes with vanilla frosting (colored of course in different girly colors with sprinkles) to accompany juice boxes. Sorry moms, I’m getting them all sugared up before dinner time. This little party will be held at our local park for those kids to run around and get their energy out.
Family on the other hand is a little different because we have a large age range from 13 on down. So I’d like to create games and prizes that may suit all of their needs. I’ve broken out some of my “how to” books to plan out some things. Luckily, my step-mom is helping with some of the preparation so that I’m not overloaded. Yet in Malissa fashion I will be making the salsa, guacamole, and of course cake from scratch. I don’t typically have “kid” food because I’ve found sometimes that kids like to eat what adults have too. So I’m planning on grilling some marinated chicken, Italian sausages with onions and green peppers, and some hot dogs. Of course we’ll have some fresh fruit and veggies.
Now the best part and probably unfortunate part: Games. You’ve got to keep the kids entertained right? Who has it in their budget to rent horses, clowns, magicians, or a bouncy castle? I remember the good old fashion birthday parties where you guessed how many M&M’s were in a jar, or you tried to put a clothes pin into a small jar, pin the tail on whatever, piñata, water balloon toss, or musical chairs. So, I’m going to bring back the good ole fun with some of these games to keep them entertained with the parents. I might even have one or two with them involved as well.
It’s just my personality where I like to have everything planned from the moment the guests arrive until the moment they leave. I like to make sure everyone has a good time.
So, get ready to party and celebrate my little girl turning one.
This year Jillian is getting 2 parties. Yes, 2. I know she is only 1 but well since we live in the city and have city friends we need one here. I couldn’t ask my friends to drive down about 1 hour to come for a party. But we need one with all of the family because you only turn 1 once…
For our friends I decided to make it as low key as possible making chocolate cupcakes with vanilla frosting (colored of course in different girly colors with sprinkles) to accompany juice boxes. Sorry moms, I’m getting them all sugared up before dinner time. This little party will be held at our local park for those kids to run around and get their energy out.
Family on the other hand is a little different because we have a large age range from 13 on down. So I’d like to create games and prizes that may suit all of their needs. I’ve broken out some of my “how to” books to plan out some things. Luckily, my step-mom is helping with some of the preparation so that I’m not overloaded. Yet in Malissa fashion I will be making the salsa, guacamole, and of course cake from scratch. I don’t typically have “kid” food because I’ve found sometimes that kids like to eat what adults have too. So I’m planning on grilling some marinated chicken, Italian sausages with onions and green peppers, and some hot dogs. Of course we’ll have some fresh fruit and veggies.
Now the best part and probably unfortunate part: Games. You’ve got to keep the kids entertained right? Who has it in their budget to rent horses, clowns, magicians, or a bouncy castle? I remember the good old fashion birthday parties where you guessed how many M&M’s were in a jar, or you tried to put a clothes pin into a small jar, pin the tail on whatever, piñata, water balloon toss, or musical chairs. So, I’m going to bring back the good ole fun with some of these games to keep them entertained with the parents. I might even have one or two with them involved as well.
It’s just my personality where I like to have everything planned from the moment the guests arrive until the moment they leave. I like to make sure everyone has a good time.
So, get ready to party and celebrate my little girl turning one.
Friday, May 7, 2010
What Mother's Day means to me
Wow, I still can’t believe that I’m a mother. Yes I carried my kids, yes I gave birth to them but it is still all surreal to me. Even when my kids call me mom, I sometimes look around like who me? I wouldn’t be the mom I am today if it had not been for my own mother and step-mother.
Although, my mother would never win the June Cleaver award, she however did give me a strong foundation. I believe it was her love of music that gives me warm fuzzies even to this day when I hear certain songs. Christmas was always special because she would play the classic Christmas songs song by the greats. Also we would make all kinds of Christmas cookies and decorate them. She wasn’t the best cook in the world with her “out of the can or box” method but there were a few meals that were pretty decent. She could make the best bread to rival any baker. She always made us feel better when we were sick by buying us 7up for sore scratchy throats or chocolate pudding. Even when we had the chicken pox for the 2nd time, she knew just what to do to soothe us.
My step-mother picked up the things my mother lacked. A good home-cooked meal and even took us step by step to make it. Nothing was ever out of a box unless it was baking soda. She would take the time to listen to our problems and help us with solutions. She taught me how to properly clean. She would say, “A lick and promise won’t do.”
I take these tidbits of information and store them in my brain. I retrieve them when my kids get an ouchy, when they need someone to talk to, or when I think about what to make for dinner. The other day Braedon said to me, “Mom, you make the best rolls.” I was elated and thought wow, a four-year-old critic. I thought, will he be saying this when he gets older?
I carry on the traditions of Christmas and hope my kids will do the same. I already know they love the Christmas music because they ask to hear it when Christmas has long past. I try awfully hard to be the best mom I can given the circumstances of raising 3 kids under 4. I often say they need to take turns with mommy and that I’m only one person. It’s funny when I’m taking care of one and state it’s their turn. The others either accept it or they say no, it’s my turn.
I would like for them to remember the good times we’ve had when they help me in the kitchen either making rolls, dinner, or one of their birthday cakes. (Yes their birthday cakes….I really pride myself on making whatever cake their heart desires.) It may not always turn out exactly as they wanted but their imagination takes over what my lack of decorating skills can muster.
Too me, mother’s day is a day to remember the person who has taken care of you throughout your life. I only appreciate this more as now I’m experiencing things. I’d like to tell my kids that yes I changed your diapers, I have potty trained you, I have wiped your butts when you call from the bathroom stating, “wipe my butt” without a please, when you have a nightmare—I comfort you, I bathe and cloth you, I arrange for playdates with friends and family, I have taken you out to museums, parks, pools…you name it. (It’s cute that I’ve taught Braedon to say thanks at the littlest things. So the other day when he wanted his butt wiped, he said thanks mommy. I couldn’t help but smile.)
I know the list could go on and on….
I’m not saying nominate me for the best mom award…no by far. I just want them to know that I am doing the best for them I know how. I learn something new every day in this job field. Again, I’m still new here even with it being 4 years into this job. I don’t think you can call yourself a veteran until your child is out the door at age 18-20.
It’s nice to know that I’m still on probation and that I’m still learning. Hopefully, they’ll be patient with me and teach me things along the way. I certainly am learning the ins/outs of each one. As soon as I have one figured out, they change personalities or do something they’ve never done before.
So, I don’t need one day to know that I’m a Mother and I should be treated differently on that day. Heck if I were, I would think there was something wrong with my family.
Although, my mother would never win the June Cleaver award, she however did give me a strong foundation. I believe it was her love of music that gives me warm fuzzies even to this day when I hear certain songs. Christmas was always special because she would play the classic Christmas songs song by the greats. Also we would make all kinds of Christmas cookies and decorate them. She wasn’t the best cook in the world with her “out of the can or box” method but there were a few meals that were pretty decent. She could make the best bread to rival any baker. She always made us feel better when we were sick by buying us 7up for sore scratchy throats or chocolate pudding. Even when we had the chicken pox for the 2nd time, she knew just what to do to soothe us.
My step-mother picked up the things my mother lacked. A good home-cooked meal and even took us step by step to make it. Nothing was ever out of a box unless it was baking soda. She would take the time to listen to our problems and help us with solutions. She taught me how to properly clean. She would say, “A lick and promise won’t do.”
I take these tidbits of information and store them in my brain. I retrieve them when my kids get an ouchy, when they need someone to talk to, or when I think about what to make for dinner. The other day Braedon said to me, “Mom, you make the best rolls.” I was elated and thought wow, a four-year-old critic. I thought, will he be saying this when he gets older?
I carry on the traditions of Christmas and hope my kids will do the same. I already know they love the Christmas music because they ask to hear it when Christmas has long past. I try awfully hard to be the best mom I can given the circumstances of raising 3 kids under 4. I often say they need to take turns with mommy and that I’m only one person. It’s funny when I’m taking care of one and state it’s their turn. The others either accept it or they say no, it’s my turn.
I would like for them to remember the good times we’ve had when they help me in the kitchen either making rolls, dinner, or one of their birthday cakes. (Yes their birthday cakes….I really pride myself on making whatever cake their heart desires.) It may not always turn out exactly as they wanted but their imagination takes over what my lack of decorating skills can muster.
Too me, mother’s day is a day to remember the person who has taken care of you throughout your life. I only appreciate this more as now I’m experiencing things. I’d like to tell my kids that yes I changed your diapers, I have potty trained you, I have wiped your butts when you call from the bathroom stating, “wipe my butt” without a please, when you have a nightmare—I comfort you, I bathe and cloth you, I arrange for playdates with friends and family, I have taken you out to museums, parks, pools…you name it. (It’s cute that I’ve taught Braedon to say thanks at the littlest things. So the other day when he wanted his butt wiped, he said thanks mommy. I couldn’t help but smile.)
I know the list could go on and on….
I’m not saying nominate me for the best mom award…no by far. I just want them to know that I am doing the best for them I know how. I learn something new every day in this job field. Again, I’m still new here even with it being 4 years into this job. I don’t think you can call yourself a veteran until your child is out the door at age 18-20.
It’s nice to know that I’m still on probation and that I’m still learning. Hopefully, they’ll be patient with me and teach me things along the way. I certainly am learning the ins/outs of each one. As soon as I have one figured out, they change personalities or do something they’ve never done before.
So, I don’t need one day to know that I’m a Mother and I should be treated differently on that day. Heck if I were, I would think there was something wrong with my family.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Identity crisis
Who am I and what happened to my identity? When I was a little girl I knew exactly who I was the apple of my father’s eye, the youngest girl, and the big sister to my younger brother. During my teen years, life was about trying to fit in, school, and boys. My 20’s were about college, jobs, and adult boys. This was an exciting time for me. I was able to come and go as I wanted. Spend my money freely and do as I pleased. I guess you could say that I was free. I couldn’t imagine being married or having children. My sister’s were having kids and I saw how their lives were and I didn’t want their life. I was having a good time.
Finally, I meet the right boy. One who was grounded in life and began to tame my wild side. Luckily for me, he was the right one and I snatched him up quickly. Yes, quickly. We meet and were married within 9 months. Here was my first identity change going from single to married life. It was quite fun in the beginning to play the married couple and navigate life with a partner. It was strange however that my name had changed and then I began to change. I wasn’t carefree Malissa anymore. I had to be a little more responsible because now I was sharing my life with someone else. I liked being Mrs. Jones but felt weird when people called me by my married name. After all, I spent 22 years being Malissa Durkee.
We went on being “this couple” for 10 years before we decided to have kids. Why did we wait so long? Well, I really wasn’t responsible enough. I wasn’t only not mentally prepared but we weren’t financially either. (Looking back on our decision, we know we could have done it…just would have taken more sacrifice). So coming up with decision was a shock to me. I thought no way are we having kids and no way was I going to stay home and no way was I going to do ½ the things that I’ve done as a mom.
Alright, so I’ve become a Mom. When I was pregnant with Braedon it was all surreal to me. Yes I was getting bigger and yes there was evidence I was pregnant but I didn’t realize it. Even after he came home and I was taking care of him, it still didn’t register that my identity had changed. I felt like I was Malissa + 1. Then when I started to lose sleep, changed diapers, did more laundry and I was at home did I realize my title had changed.
Before this I was working a good job and although I knew I was going to quit to take care of my baby….I didn’t realize I was about to change. I immediately turned into the breastfeeding, co-sleeping, never let your child cry, never let your child touch anything dirty, always had to be changed on schedule, and that I had to take him everywhere I went. Yes, I became a baby wearing mama. It’s funny that I ordered a Bjorn and it came on the day he was born….how ironic is that? Since then, we’ve added 2 more kids to the Jones clan.
It’s a rarity that I’m without my children. Partially because I’m a worry-wart and don’t like them to be without me. (Again who best to cater to their every whim than MOM). Plus I’ve taken on the role as the stay-at-home mom and now their teacher. So, it is rare to see me without them. When I don’t have them as my shield, I feel naked as if my Mommy powers have been stripped. ‘You no longer have your kids and therefore you are vulnerable to your arch nemesis…the world.’ I feel lost without them but relieved to have some time to myself. Hence, my identity crisis. Am I Malissa or shall I change my official documents to Mom?
I get a big chuckle when my kids call me Malissa. I laugh at the thought that yes that is my name but I am glad when you call me Mom.
Friday, April 30, 2010
My first post
Well here I go, my first blog and my first post. Not sure who would be interested in reading this but I’m mainly doing this for my children so they can hear all my rants/raves. I’ve been meaning to start one for some time now (I have a few friends who have one and please forgive me if I copy your style’s—really its meant to be a compliment).
I really want this to be a sort of online diary for my kids to read and have laughs/memories. It’s sad that now that I have kids, my parents are unable to say—hey your kids act just like you or you did the same thing at that age. I know I’m starting late…really late. See I’ve got 3 kids—4,3, and almost 1.
I turned 39 this year and I’m not getting any younger. I would say that I’m an unconventional mom in these times (Although, living in Hyde Park—I’ve found a few people who have some common interests). How am I unconventional? Well most of you would be surprised to know that all of my births were natural and our last one was born at home. Yes, little Ms. J was born at 4 am, into her daddy’s loving arms. This was what some would call an unassisted childbirth. A what? This is where you decide to have your baby at home with no medical personnel or birthing assistants. Everything went as we planned and it was a rewarding and most wonderful experience.
On another note, we make our own bread. Why, when you can pick one up at the grocery store? The simple fact the fresh is always best. The whole house smells yummy and the kids get such a kick out of the process. Now, don’t let me fool you, we have a bread machine that does all the hard work. We just put in the ingredients-beep- 3 hours later, we have a nice loaf to eat.
Our other unconventional thinking is our decision to homeschool our children. Some might argue that given our school system in Chicago-- this might be the logical conclusion. That’s one reason. The others are private school is $5000 per kid, public schools are facing cutbacks meaning large class size and less individual attention, part of me doesn’t want to let my children go off with people they don’t know, and then well I’m a college educated woman….so why the heck not. I stay at home with them..why not fill their heads up with my knowledge and much more.
So, this is my first introduction. Did I get the who, what, where, when and why answered? My journalism teachers would be so proud. Who is the best subject to interview but us?
Welcome to my blog..check back and I’ll try to update things daily. (yeah right)
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